The final countdown....this WAS WAR!!!!

Armageddon as defined in the dictionary is “the place where the final battle will be fought between the forces of good and evil”.  Another definition is “the last and completely destructive battle: or finally, any great and crucial conflict”.

I am here today to tell you that Armageddon came a little to close to home.  I know we have been hearing this for decades, and certainly from people with more credibility than me but let me rain some cold hard facts down on you from a house that was under siege in Austin, Texas.

First, let me warn you that the next few paragraphs are graphic in nature and will contain photographic evidence that some of my readers may find disturbing.  With this in mind, read on – perhaps in small groups.  Definitely with the lights on and loud music playing.

Saturday night…much like any other Saturday except Madi and I knew we were not alone in the house.  As we made our way to the kitchen, the lights were off (first mistake) and we decided our best defense was a good offense as we loudly made our way into the room.  Our thought:  giving the intruder the opportunity to leave before we got there.  At first glance it appeared our strategy worked.  NOT SO!!  Let me at this moment give a special shout out to my boot camp trainer, Lisa.  Had it not been for the workouts I have been doing, I would not have been able to jump on that island counter in one giant leap.  After rebounding from my shock at being able to do that, it was back to the task at hand.  Did I mention…..MOUSE!!!!!!!

I manned the kitchen island while Madi called for armed back-up (Terry).  When he came in with his weapon of choice (a shoe, really?)  I pointed out where God’s only mistake was making his way and quickly retreated to the bedroom.  After several long minutes, Terry returned and it was obvious by his expression, he was not victorious.  Since we were aware we were under attack, we had put strategies in place to eliminate this intruder.  When I say “we” I mean Terry because my role in this whole deal is to ask daily….ANYTHING TO REPORT?  This generally resulted in an avoidance of good solid eye contact and a mumbled response.  However, we were now at a point when I needed to review our arsenal.  What I saw was frightening.

Hey look, peanut butter and flour!

Can anyone identify this?

I know you can see the prints

Me neither.  What was supposed to be a “mouse trap” can only be defined as a fully loaded buffet that must be calling mice from all areas to come on over to the French house where all the food is locked down but the traps are fully loaded and its free.  Seriously, we even found little flour paw prints where the rodent retreated after feasting.  When I asked how many of these buffets were out and about in the house, the answer made me weep.  After collecting and disposing of all the original “traps” AND with instructions not to return home until new purchases of same had been made, Terry and Madi left for the store.

Twenty-four hours later and all is well again in the French household.  We are living free and easy and word on the street is peanut-butter/flour laden trays of goodness laying about for mice, lizards and God only knows what  are no longer being served at this address.   

May this never happen again.

(I hate those meeses to pieces)

Until next time,

Your pal,

Kari